so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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