For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
