Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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