I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
