You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
