Cold hands, warm shart.
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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