Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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