i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
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