I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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