just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Randomize
