I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
