I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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