White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
