There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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