people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize