Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
She swung at the pinata with crutches
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize