Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
don't judge my taste in strippers
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
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