so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
