why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
