Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
id be glad to
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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