why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
