Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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