I think i sorta joined a cult last night
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize