did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
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