Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
