Is it normal to miss your booty call?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
