I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
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