sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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