I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
