Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
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