best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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