I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Redeem this text for a blowjob
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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