I hate all girls vehemently.
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
