Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
