Texts From Last Night

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  (314): View more from Missouri

  My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig

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  (314): My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig http://tfl.nu/q8sk
  Replies (3) Good night (1096) Bad night (770)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad

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  (813): Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad http://tfl.nu/80vf
  Replies (23) Good night (1084) Bad night (3540)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid

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  (314): I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid http://tfl.nu/zczt
  Replies (35) Good night (1547) Bad night (3170)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes

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  (859): i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes http://tfl.nu/xf12
  Replies (19) Good night (906) Bad night (3563)
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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"

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  (985): when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this" http://tfl.nu/g0yg
  Replies (9) Good night (2143) Bad night (6408)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.

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  (314): She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good. http://tfl.nu/atnn
  Replies (2) Good night (2484) Bad night (749)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?

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  (214): Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me? http://tfl.nu/3sua
  Replies (19) Good night (1019) Bad night (2174)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.

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  (417): I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life. http://tfl.nu/1dwn
  Replies (11) Good night (896) Bad night (1866)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.

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  (860): Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta. http://tfl.nu/gtno
  Replies (12) Good night (570) Bad night (2415)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.

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  (201): We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two. http://tfl.nu/ib5v
  Replies (1) Good night (1131) Bad night (475)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward

  (213): View more from California

  There's a lil minaj in everyone

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  (323): I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward (213): There's a lil minaj in everyone http://tfl.nu/33cz
  Replies (7) Good night (1686) Bad night (738)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.

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  (913): just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone. http://tfl.nu/qc7n
  Replies (6) Good night (1431) Bad night (533)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache

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  (507): I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache http://tfl.nu/4l2z
  Replies (5) Good night (494) Bad night (1045)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.

  (1-314): View more from Missouri

  Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.

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  (314): I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault. (1-314): Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush. http://tfl.nu/fjsh
  Replies (5) Good night (1260) Bad night (613)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head

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  (925): After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head http://tfl.nu/8zj4
  Replies (4) Good night (886) Bad night (259)

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