I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
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