Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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