i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
