there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
