I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize