remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
