Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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