Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
