why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
