I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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