forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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