My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
