Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize