so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
i believe in u and ur pee
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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