yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
