sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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